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Things Without Names

There are things without names That we dream in our sleep That we taste on our tongues Sometimes cold, sometimes sweet
There are feelings and memories That grow under our skin That know all the answers And keep them locked within
There are things without names That creep in the dark Restless and yearning For the morning skylark
There are colors that hover Just out of our reach We're grasping at rainbows We learn, and we teach
There are things without names That live in our minds That manifest in daydreams And take up all our time
There are patterns of shadows There are footprints in sand There are waves of exhaustion After tugging at your hand
There are things without names Let them continue untouched Let them always be unnamed Sometimes names are too much

Sometimes just a whisper Is all that you might need An arm around shoulders And an ear for a story

Sunsets and Thunderstorms

"It's just a sunset!"
"Yeah, it's  a sunset, and it happens every day but that doesn't make it any less beautiful."
"Yeah, so it's beautiful every time. Nothing new."
"Wrong. It's a different sunset every day."
"My point is, there will always be a sunset, and if it's beautiful every time, when spend time looking at it every day?"
"Because. Eomma taught me to always search for the beautiful and treasure them. Then, when you only see the ugly things, you have all those beautiful memories."
"Can't we make beautiful memories not necessarily looking at the sunset?"
"Of course we can. It's just that we can also make beautiful memories staring at the sunset. Look at this conversation. Now you know why I love sunsets so much."
"Because they're beautiful?"
"Because they're always beautiful."
"You're always beautiful."
"Mm, cheesy, but I like it.&qu…

I wrote the end first.

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"You can't protect me from everything. I've gotta make my own mistakes." Youngjae's voice was as soft as ever, but there was no mistaking the frustration in his eyes.
Daehyun opened and closed his mouth, denying the truth. "I don't want you to get hurt." Even as he said it, he knew it was a poor excuse.
Youngjae stopped pacing. "Sometimes you have to get hurt. Everybody gets broken a little at some point. If we don't get a little broken, how can we know when we're whole? Sure, nobody wants to be broken, nobody wants pain in their lives, but they sure as hell want happiness, just like I do. I'd just rather get the breaking done and over with."
Daehyun processed what Youngjae was saying at a much slower rate than usual. All this talk of breaking and pain made his heart hurt. Did Youngjae understand that if he got hurt, Daehyun would hurt too? But then, it worked in reverse. There was no mistaking the hurt in Youngjae's eyes…

Fanfiction Covers

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Could be, Couldn't Be

Fantasy is split up into two major sub-genres: fantasy that couldn't be and fantasy that could be.
I seem to gravitate towards fantasy that couldn't be, because that's easy to read. It takes less understanding, less digestive thought and really only requires reading. To read the words, know what they mean, follow the storyline, root for the good guys and finish with a general satisfaction of "evil is vanquished once again."
Fantasy that could be is a lot harder, both to read and definitely to write. The master of this is, of course, Tolkien. He created a whole world, languages, cultures, races, stories, histories - so much information that it begins to feel like it's more than just a story, it's folklore, it's something that might have happened long, long ago, when the world was younger and greener.
Writing fantasy that couldn't be is no simple task either, but it's much easier to remain surface level with something that you don't need to co…

The Pennyman cover

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Never Ends

You want me when I don't want you When I do want you I don't know what I should do I want you when you don't want me And I'm beginning to think that this is our destiny
You want me when I don't want you And it hurts when you speak Like I feel the way you do You appear and I'm torn You break my heart so I break yours We're as predictable and rhythmic As the waves on the shore
And as sure as the sunrise We'll come back again And as sure as the fickle moon We'll part ways again And it's the same and I'm tired of how it never ends So let it end But then
I want you when you don't want me And I'm desperate like a fish Returning to the sea I'm on the edge and you pause We're just players in a tragedy And say we can never have what was
But as sure as the sunrise We'll come back again And as sure as the fickle moon We'll part ways again And it's the same and I'm tired of how it never ends So let it end But then
You want me when I don't want you B…

The Hunger Diaries, The Vampire Games

I had to post this somewhere, so I'm posting it here.
I was watching a short fan film of the Hunger Games and it got me thinking about how I always preferred Peeta over Gale, even though most people thought Peeta was a wimp and didn't deserve Katniss. But I always believed that Peeta was the stronger one in a lot of ways. Even though Katniss had a tough exterior, she was pretty fragile emotionally. Peeta was the opposite. It didn't show as much in the beginning. It was Katniss=toughness and Peeta=softness, but throughout Catching Fire things changed. Then in Mockingjay everything went to hell, but I think Peeta really was the stronger one in the end.
ANYways, I was thinking about it, and what my reasons were. Gale seems more like a "real man," the type you gravitate towards because he can protect you. His love is intense and kind of all-or-nothing. But at its core, his love is a selfish love, so whilst he could protect you, it would always be a worry as to who he…

She is Ocean Blue

She is a moment She is a single drop of rain Just a flightless feather Drifting alone on the grassy plain
She is a molecule She is the universe A string of notes that hold their own Against the weighty verse
Ooh-ooh, she doesn't want to be found by you Ooh-ooh, she hides behind her clouds She brings the thunder out She is the truest ocean blue
She is a hummingbird She is a myth A lonely goddess amongst All the fools she kissed
She is a siren She is an ordinary heart An empty canvas waiting To be filled with art
Ooh-ooh, she doesn't want to be found by you Ooh-ooh, she hides behind her clouds She brings the thunder out She is the truest ocean blue
Underneath her skin Her life song pulses through her blood She is still so pure Hold her up, keep her from the mud
Of the every day And all the things you say Just to keep her sane Because she is your girl
All those crazy days All those crazy things you say Just to keep her sane And to keep her in your world
Ooh-ooh, she can only be found by you Ooh-ooh, you find her beh…

No Other Word

I can't find another word except beautiful Nothing else really says what I mean And what I mean is that you are so Utterly and completely beautiful
I was drowning and you pulled me up From the deep and now I'm on the top I have you to thank for saving me And I can only say you're beautiful
I tried to find some other words And talk about you eloquently But every time I'm stuck on how your heart Is utterly and completely sweet
I was drowning and you pulled me out From myself and all my doubts I have you to thank for saving me And I can only say you're beautiful
There are other ways to tell you how I wouldn't, couldn't be here without Your hands, your heart, your constant smile You're like heaven spilling down in the sunrise
I was drowning and you pulled me through I was so lost until I ran into you I have you to thank for saving me And I can only say you're beautiful
No other word No other word will do No other word to describe you In my eyes, you are beautiful

Reflection

Hand over heart As I try to breathe away the scars Cutting into me like a knife The enemy Is someone anyone can see And she wants to take my life
Won't stop at anger Won't stop at screaming into the night She thirsts for danger She thirsts for blood dripping from the knife
Sometimes she who stares back at me Sees me clearer than I can see myself But why is my reflection So bent on spilling lies Like it tries so hard to waste my life
Feet underground I'm moving but I'm losing ground To the flaws that eat me alive The enemy Is back and taking hold of me She's not afraid to use the knife
Won't stop at hurting Won't stop at staring at my broken skin She thirsts for bleeding She thirsts for pain to end the pain I am in
Sometimes she who stares back at me See me clearer than I can see myself But now my reflection Is bent on spilling lies Like its bent on wasting my life
I'm bleeding out In more ways that one And by the time I realize just what I've done She's already laughing 'Caus…

Dreams

You're hurting And I'm just stuck here standing by the sidelines So many graves I never noticed before People I never knew, I never knew they existed before I still can't find it in me to care So many bones stuck in the ground Make earthenware with what we've found It's all just come to dust Eventually our iron bones will rust And then what will be left of us? When our stories fall out of time
'Cause we all are just dreamers Finding time in our sleep To take back what we need, what we think we need And we all want to be Dreamers, dancing in our sleep Echoes of our lives But out of reality's reach
I'm hurting, I think And you're just standing there by the gravestones Of so, so many unknowns People, dreamers like ourselves Many lives wasted Many lives untasted Many lives fulfilled and I wish we could be Like those busy little bees Finding happiness in simple things In the end we're just bones Just empty souls longing to find home Do we find it or are we stuck with dust With en…

the one left behind

I am the one left behind

I don't think it's on purpose
By some spiteful or absent mind

But as a matter of course
Or a matter of indecision
I am the one left behind

Regardless, might I add
Of my age or knowledge
Regardless of my sentiment
That others don't acknowledge

It's simply the way that everyone goes
I am not quite ready to follow
So I am the one left behind.

And it rather hurts
And it makes me want to cry
And I hate that I am stuck here
While everyone passes by

The road unmarked is left for me
The road most traveled is banned to me
So I am the one left behind

It's not my intention to be one of them
It's not my direction to wallow or bend
But walking alone easily becomes
The death of one

No one will notice
Because I hate to complain
Or someone will notice
And I'll heartily complain

But at the end of all those words
Or lack thereof
There is merely sympathy
Not understanding
And I am the one left behind

Again.

Unattainable

I just wanted to be beautiful Like her, like her, like her My hair a waterfall of silk Like her, like her, I'm not like her My skin glowing like the moon My eyes an ocean too My figure like a sculpture for your house My hands are empty without yours I want love and hope and more I just wanted to beautiful
Why have I failed, I failed, I failed I'm more ugly than before I'm a shadow, shadow, shadow I can't be ugly if I want to be yours
I just wanted to be beautiful Like her, like her, like her I want to be as perfect Like her, like her, I'm not like her My voice as silver as the stars Give you shivers in your heart My scent will draw you in until you're mine But I'm so far away from that I'm hopeless and I'm fat I just wanted to be beautiful
Why have I failed, I failed, I failed I'm more ugly than before I'm a shadow, shadow, shadow I can't be ugly if I want to be yours
Why do I want to be yours What does that say When every day I give a little more Throwing pieces of m…

When the Heart Breaks

I know the sound that the heart makes When the heart breaks And it isn't a sound at all It's weighty silence Filling up my ears And I don't want to hear it at all
I want noise, I want guns Not these pounding silent drums I want anything but this
I want love, I want life I was hope, I want light I want happiness
I know the sound that the heart makes When the heart breaks And I never want to heart it again
You know the sound that the heart makes When the heart breaks And it isn't a sound at all It's dreadful silence Filling up your ears And you don't want to hear it at all
You want noise, you want screams Not this darkness, or these dreams You want anything but this
You want love, you want life You want hope, you want light You want happiness
You know the sound that the heart makes When the heart breaks And you never want to hear it again

One Breath

We said, one day We'd be stars in the sky Holding hands, in space We'd illuminate the night Now that day, it's gone And you left without me I'm lonely, I'm torn I miss having you beside me
I remember the day Your heart stopped beating Honestly, I wanted mine to Stop beating too But that's selfish, I'm breathing My heart is still beating I've got keep on breathing for you
One step, one breath I'll keep on breathing for you
We lived, like fools Running around in our heads Playing games, being cool What was the life we led? Now you're gone, I'm hurt I walk this road alone My heart, it burns I wish you could come back home
I remember the day Your heart stopped beating Honestly, I wanted mine To stop beating too But that's selfish, I'm breathing My heart is still beating I've got to keep on breathing for you
One step, one breath I'll keep on breathing for you
Surrounded by love Why isn't it enough To keep the fire in my heart alive My dreams, fading I'll catch…

Torn

Would you hold me tighter If I was a little bit nicer Would you take my hand In front of everyone Would you pull me in closer And I would try harder to know you Would you want to be something In front of everyone
If I chose my bite my tongue 'Cause you're not just anyone You're the one I want to stay by In the storm and through the night If I hold back on my thoughts And give you all you think I ought Is it right to want to be with you When you always tell me what to do
I'm torn, I can't tell left from right I'm worn, you're leaving me so cold I'm hurt, I'm bleeding on the ground I'm torn, 'cause I won't do as I'm told
If I just held back You want this or that And I do what you like Dusk to sunrise You pick red when I'm blue But I'm over the moon When you smile at me And my senses leave Because you are the one You've got to be I'm holding onto This truth of you for me What if I'm wrong Why am I holding my tongue
I'm torn, I can't tell left…

Paper Hearts

We may not walk on the beach, my love But that doesn't mean we can't dream And running down hotel hallways is More romantic than it seems As long as we're together, love It's a perfect memory Wherever, whenever, you will Always be the greatest company
We may not get out much but My love, it's all alright All the days before us are Just stepping stones on our lifeline Whether we have 100 years Or we're cut short on time I'll never regret this happiness When your hand is holding mine
We might be unconventional But love, this is our fate We carve it from the tree trunks When we're leaving the garden gate All the roses and the breathless nights Running around in the rain If given the chance to go back Oh darling, I'd do it all the same
Someday we will be a story In a children's book I'll draw my love in crayons And give you a sideways look This song is not enough To tell you what you mean to me But I'll send you paper hearts If you will send some back to me

Running Home

Too much I didn't know how to say So I got in my boat and decided to sail away Turned too late and went over the waterfall Would've stayed under but I heard your call
Oh, I'm running back to you Just wait, I'll be home soon I'm tripping on my own feet Just to get to where our eyes meet And the touch of your fingers on my cheek My heart won't tell my lips how to speak
Too much I didn't know how to do So I went to school to learn how to love you Everything they told me made no sense Eating books is a poor sustenance
Oh, I'm running back to you Just wait, I'll be home soon I'm tripping on my own feet Just to get to where our eyes meet And the touch of your fingers on my cheek My heart won't tell my lips how to speak I'm running home to you
The rain fell hard on the roof that day Every room, another leak, less room to stay We clasped hands inside the tree house  You agreed to be my spouse Oh, happy day!
Oh, I'm running back to you Just wait, I'll be home soon I…

Pen Pals

It may seem a bit untoward to tell you what to do If you don't take my advice I won't think any less of you It's your life on the line and you've got everything to prove So it's your choice whether to get up on your feet and move
Maybe it's unlikely that we'll ever meet again So I'd like to take this chance to tell you that I'm still your friend Whether or not I never to get to see your smiling face I'll still be happy watching you as you run the race
I don't know what to call our strange relationship But I'm glad to be the receiving end your awful penmanship


I didn't think I'd be the one that made you turn your head Honestly I was so surprised you managed to think ahead So when you grabbed my arm in the middle of the crowd There's never been a time when my heart would beat so loud
It's strange to see the corners of mouth curve in a smile Two strangers, friends, drinking coffee after such a while We talked as if we'd …