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Showing posts from May, 2017

insomnia

It’s dark in here.
I like it that way.
I like it when the lights are off and the darkness gives me space. 
In the absence of shadows I play with the wall.
He tells me I’m okay and it’s okay to fall.
The lightbulbs I can’t see, they tell me to shut up.
They say to go to sleep, that sleeping is a must.
Their cries fall on deaf ears
But not ‘cause I can’t hear.
Sleep is just my nemesis of sorts, something I chase without reprieve,
Something I hunger for and desperately need.
But while I wait for my eyes to close and brain to shut down and my body to rest,
I’m quiet in the darkness.
Just me and my thoughts here.
And the cries of the lightbulbs
And the temptation of fear.
But it’s been years,
Years! Since the dark frightened me.
We’re friends now, and that’s good, since sleep abandoned me.
I never had it, really

sometimes words; sometimes wonder

sometimes i don’t have words, and only wonder
sometimes the current’s too strong, and pulls me under
slowly, i drift until the morning comes and i’m
hopeless, breathless, drying out beneath the dawn
sometimes i’m quiet, and the birds sing for me
sometimes i’m silenced, and the trees speak with breezes
cautious, careful, i look where i put my feet
but falling is easy when you’re always hiding
sometimes i don’t have warmth, and only shivers
sometimes i dread the night, and feel so bitter
my blood is rushing through my body
hot enough to freeze my heart and
i can’t for the life of me
find a way to breathe again
lifeless, lying on the rocks beside the sea
breathless again, my chest so still
the whales are keening
the evening cloaks me in mist
and i disappear without a trace
now i’m a star of stars, and not alone
put against the black of night, shining stones
i haven’t got a heartbeat but i am still alive
i’m singing in the heavens and i know i’ll never die
sometimes i don’t have words, and only wonder
sometimes …

scrapbook

hold my hand
we’re stuck in a photograph
a memory
of a time not too long past
we’re holding on to what we used to have close your eyes
I’ll sing you a lullaby
we’ll steal the stars
and then paint the sky
we’ll ride the wind and hold on tight you and me
summers and winters
seasons pass
I’m counting on my fingers
memories
of what used to be
you and me
breaking tradition
we rule the world
joy is our mission
memories
of what used to be years roll by
we’re stuck in a photograph
holding on to a time not too long past